Frühjahrsputz der wissenschaftlichen Abteilung

Item Description: 74 strands of linguine spaghetti that elongate indefinitely when exposed to boiling water. Spaghetti produced this way is edible and widely regarded to be pleasant.

Date of Recovery: 01/12/2022

Location of Recovery: Le ███████, Sicily, Italy.

Current Status: Stored in the Site-11 break room in the refrigerator, staff are permitted to boil them as long as they cut off a portion for the next person.

Item Description: A plastic spray bottle. When filled with water and sprayed at a human, 15 to 40 liters of ice water will manifest above said human before demanifesting 5 seconds later. Notably, absorbed water will not demanifest, leaving the affected's clothes soaked.

Date of Recovery: 05/02/2023

Location of Recovery: ███████ Pet Store, Lowell, Massachusetts, USA

Current Status: Held in a Size-III object storage locker at Site-54 for fluid mechanics research.

Item Description: A refillable fountain pen, not apparently unusual. Anything written by the pen can only be read between sunset and sunrise; at all other times, the writing will appear as meaningless gibberish regardless of what was written.

Date of Recovery: 1/9/2023

Location of Recovery: Found on a park bench in Cincinnati, OH

Current Status: In storage.

Item Description: A Kodak Easyshare model digital camera. Anyone but its current owner who attempts to pick up the item without express permission (written or verbal) will discover that they have not actually done so, despite (often) having memories to the contrary. What causes this effect and how it manifests are currently unknown.

Date of Recovery: 12/22/2022

Location of Recovery: Left to Researcher Hernandez, as an inheritance by a relative.

Current Status: Being tested, with the permission of Researcher Hernandez.

Note: Researcher Hernandez was interviewed regarding the item, and does not recall the item having its anomalous property in the past. She does remember the relative being insistent on not touching other people's things without permission, but it is unknown whether this has any relation to the anomaly. This seems to have been the case as far back as she can remember.

Item Description: A white metal water bottle that is 1 foot tall, 3.7 inches wide, and can hold 34oz of liquid inside of it. Any liquid poured inside will be instantly transformed into "████'s Hiking Juice!"

The new liquid has a soupy texture and seems to be made primarily out of milk with hints of sugar, an unidentified sweet cream, and a 50% quantity of SCP-████. Contents are always warm, and extremely nutritious.

Date of Recovery: 11/11/09

Location of Recovery: Yellowstone National Park, Montana.

Current Status: In storage.

Item Description: Small blue ceramic plate, visually identical to many commercially available varieties. Whenever a human subject utters some variation of the phrase "I wish I had a cookie," in any language, a cookie manifests on the plate. Cookies produced in this way are safe for consumption and often described as "delicious." If the subject wishes for a specific type of cookie, one will be produced. If no preference is stated, the plate will produce a chocolate chip cookie.

Date of Recovery: 10/3/2023

Location of Recovery: The kitchen of a bakery in Tulsa, Oklahoma.

Current Status: In the Site-19 break room, available for use by all personnel.

Item Description: The original papyrus codex hosting the Gospel of Mary. Reading through summons the primary Abrahamic deity. Interacting with this deity results in physical alteration into a biblical angel.

Date of recovery: 06/14/2019

Location Of Recovery: Delivered personally to Site-17 by civilian private investigator Argent Holister.

Current Status: In Site-17 Archival Storage.

Note: Formerly an SCP object, demoted to Anomalous Item on account of the ease of containment and no other events of interest concerning this item. - Dr. Fern

Item Description: A pair of American flintlock dueling pistols, each outfitted with octagonal barrels, chambered in .56-inch (14mm) caliber lead ball. The barrels are 10 inches (250mm) long and have a spur near the trigger guard. Anomalous properties manifest when they are placed within 1 foot of each other, the 2 closest humans relative to the pistols will do everything in their power to obtain one of the pistols and eliminate the other. Subjects do not appear to be capable of running out of ammo, as extra bullets will manifesting in pockets or sleeves. When a victor is found, the process repeats until they are placed apart from each other.

Date of Recovery: 02/01/2023

Location of Recovery: An antique shop in ██████, Georgia, following the deaths of ██ people.

Current Status: In anomalous items storage.